Baddie: Stranger danger! Lesson: Never go abroad. Never poop. James here. The time has come. The stars are aligned. We have broken the final seal. It is Halloween. Today. Right now. Unless you’re reading this, like, in November. But we’re posting it on Hallow—goddamnit, the moment’s gone. Anyway, Sarah and I are joining forces this…
It’s close. It’s so very close. Halloween, people, is days away, and no matter who you are and what you’re doing, you have not yet watched enough scary movies. You really, really need to get on that. What’s that, you say? You can’t think of anything to watch? You came to this website specifically for…
Yeah…I reached for that one. Also, check out my kick-ass new banner! Courtesy, naturally, of SciFridays‘ Sarah Lawrence. Don Jon (2013): The Plot: Jon (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is a buff womanizer from New Jersey. He has a ton of sex with many attractive ladies, but he’s also addicted to porn, so the sex is never satisfying.…
Some of you have been with us since the beginning. You are heroes. Your parade is coming in the mail. It will take six to eight weeks to arrive, but it will be spectacular. The rest of you are okay. Either way, you’re here, it’s October, and that’s all that matters. Rooster Illusion tradition, passed…
Happy Halloween, ya turkeys! Halloween (1978): The Plot: Fifteen years after killing his teenage, not-a-virgin sister when he was six, Michael Myers (Austin Powers, The Love Guru) escapes from a mental institution and returns to his hometown so he can hunt down some baby sitters, because, uh…well, one girl totally keeps having sex with her…
HOLY CRAP IT IS ALMOST HALLOWEEN I HOPE YOU HAVE YOUR COSTUMES READY. What am I going as, you ask? Not sure. It’s a toss-up between Skinny Indiana Jones (Skindiana Jones?) and Video Store Clerk Who Didn’t Make a Costume. But enough of my wicked awesome Halloween plans. Let’s get on to the important stuff,…
From special guest writer Will Standish. Is there anything better than the Halloween special? No, there isn’t. Instead of the preachy plots and played out Christmas Carol adaptations of Christmas episodes, Halloween episodes allow cartoons to disregard all their inhibitions and tell the most terrifying, surreal, and often best stories to an eager audience. This…
