Baddie – Marital trust. Lesson – Marriage is inherently dangerous. Maybe. Honeymoon accomplishes a rare thing and makes me immediately hate the couple in question. It might be because their love story starts with, “lol foreign food gives you food poisoning,” or because they have cinnamon rolls instead of cake at their wedding, or because Bea…
Baddie – Underutilized myths. Lesson – Sometimes the mermaid isn’t the problem. Sometimes it’s the guy behind you holding a grappling hook. Despite the opening music sounding like someone applied the charming sounds of glass bowls over the original Jaws soundtrack, I am optimistic about Killer Mermaid (also called Nymph and originally Mamula). This is my first Serbian horror movie,…
Baddie – Convoluted horror plots. Lesson – Pick one thing. ONE. The Lazarus Effect had a lot of promise. A contemporary Frankenstein, or all the Lovecraftian implications of Re-animator. It has a stellar cast with American Horror Story‘s Evan Peters, Community‘s Donald Glover, the ethereal Olivia Wilde, and The Mindy Project‘s Mark Duplass. The methodology was solid.…
Baddie – Pollution. Nature doesn’t like it. Lesson – Dam teenagers. I’m a terrible horror movie blogger. Not for the same reasons that the internet thinks, but because somehow this little gem of a movie about zombie beavers slipped through my grasp in 2014. In a world full of ridiculous premises and in the wake of Sharknado 2and Tusk, we…
Baddie – Hollywood adaptations. Lesson – Stick to the book. Hoooo boy. I have watched a lot of mediocre fantasy movies in my day. And sometimes I’m pleasantly surprised by them. Other times they end up being a snooze fest. Rarely, however, do I leave a movie theater filled with ire. Such is the case with The…
Baddie – Blind ambition Lesson – Hitchhiking is dangerous, and business is cruel. Australiaaaaa. I love you. I love you and your fantastic horror scene. I get so weirdly excited when the opening credits start and an Australian production company scrolls across. I had no idea that 100 Bloody Acres was Australian by the description, so instead…
Baddie – History, once again. Lesson – Sometimes the map is a warning. This week I decided to check out the quietly-lurking Norwegian film Ragnarok. Based on the description, it could have gone a few ways, but in any event it was a horror movie about history and archaeology, so, sign me up. It ended up being a really…
Rooster Illusion 